One More Donut

20 Sep

donuts in a boxThe donuts were affecting Neal. Maybe it actually was true sugar kills brain cells because he could swear he was smarter when he arrived on set than he was after eating the buttermilk one, or was it the pink one with sprinkles that brought this abrupt sense of being out of touch with the soundstage, the morning, the day, the plan? Was every hole in every donut a black hole sucking up his mind? Was it performance anxiety? Stage fright for a walk on/ check phone/ walk off passerby small crowd sequence?  Was it a blood sugar thing? A brain chemistry thing? Hell, if he was clever enough to be thinking about neurotransmitters he must still be smart enough.

A chocolate frosted donut with peanuts lay there on the slightly rumpled, frosting smudged wax paper in the pink box. And what’s with the one sugar glazed with a piece cut out of it? Why was somebody always mangling the donuts and leaving the plastic knife in the box?  That’s just insult to injury. Who only eats a little piece of a sugar glazed donut, dammit? If you’re gonna have a donut, eat the whole damn donut!

But the chocolate peanut: if he didn’t eat it now, it might be gone after his walk on / check phone / walk off. But, if he did eat it now that would be three donuts and it wasn’t even 11am yet. At 11am, *Seth Rogen would be there and they’d go to work. Now of course Rogen wasn’t gonna be interested in the chocolate peanut, but the grip could be another story. Better eat it.

He’d do a water fast the rest of the day, after the coffee, and by night he’d still be under the calorie limit to keep losing. Ten more pounds and Christine said she was confident she could get him stand-in for Rogen, unless Rogen kept slimming down and Neal stalled out. Who ever thought Rogen wouldn’t always want to be the goofy fat guy?

The chocolate was giving Neal wisdom: He’d keep pace with Rogen, get stand-in, get a line, get Taft Hartleyed, get a part, get chiseled and then of course be handsome, get a role, get hooked up with the right people, get in the crowd get in the game, get the script, get on the A list, be in the right place at the right time and get the pinnacle role that Rogen would forever regret turning down! He’d get the hit, get the mansion, get the Oscar, get the girl, get while the gettin’ was good!

“Places! Action!”

Elevator doors open, take a quarter beat. Extra-Sara, extra-Paul and extra-Abbey step in, quarter beat, walk out, nod – everybody’s in a rush. Keep walking, check phone, Rogen rushes into scene, exit stage left, Rogen dashes onto elevator. Doors close.

“Cut! Let’s do it again… Places!”

Neal gets back onto the elevator and turns to see Rogen moving toward the pink box. As the doors close Neal sees Rogen slice the sugar glazed with the plastic knife, pick up a small piece, and pop it into his mouth.

*Seth Rogen is only pretend in this fiction.


2 Responses to “One More Donut”

  1. ingridf October 2, 2012 at 8:49 pm #

    Awwwww…. I want to give him the donut on a china plate. His favorite flavor.


  1. One More Donut « jeanosullivan - September 30, 2012

    […] sense of being out of touch with the soundstage, the morning, the day, the plan?…  Read One More Donut on The Character Project Share this:TwitterFacebookLike this:LikeBe the first to like […]

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