the dress by parenthesized

15 Feb

Amy could not help but wonder if she was making a mistake.

Well, to be honest, she knew she had made a horrible decision.  She twisted and turned in front of the mirror, attempting to extricate herself from the bedazzled spectacle that was the dress.  Hideous would be a polite way of describing her right now.  She had accidentally drawn her eyeliner in tiny zig zags while her other hand was busily involved curling her hair into a ridiculous style that resembled a poodle.   Of course, all of this paled in comparison to the dress.  Oh, the dress…

Comprised of a tutu stolen from a budding ballerina and yards upon yards of tulle and taffeta, the dress engulfed her petite frame.  She was more dress than woman in the monstrosity.  At the time, she had jokingly acquiesced to the dress, only because it made her future mother-in-law despise her less.  Unfortunately, her scheme to switch the dress with one of her choice, a tasteful A-line with the tiniest bit of beading, failed utterly.  The clerk had made the wrong order; it was too late to change it, and she thought everything was ruined.

Amy sat in front of the mirror as her bridesmaids clustered around her, lying to her about how beautiful she looked in the dress.  She thinks that she literally snarled at them, but she was unsure if that was her imagination or not.  When she had raised the eyeliner pencil to her eye and they saw her shaking hand, they made attempts to do her makeup for her.

She snapped.

Amy jumped up and forced her way through her friends.  She sprinted to her car in the silly crystal shoes that matched the dress and wrestled herself and the tutu into the driver’s seat.  Once she cleared the layers of tulle from the mirrors, she pulled out of the parking lot and wound up here at Bridal Designs.  She was sitting twenty miles away from her wedding in a dressing room in an ugly dress while hysterically giggling.  The tiny part of her that still possessed reason was ordering her to go back because she loved Ian, and she wanted to marry him.  The rest of her was convinced that Ian would see her in the dress and would then tell the crowd that this must be a mistake because she was not Amy.  This would happen.  She knew it.

She heard a knock on the door.  It sounded different than the clerk’s knock.  That poor woman must have been terrified when she stumbled in, bellowing for a new dress and champagne and cake.  Amy would have thought that the Tutu Woman was off the deep end too.  Ha!  Maybe that would be her new name, Tutu Woman, since it seemed she was never going to escape this dress.

“Hey Amy, it’s Emily.  Will you come out please?”

“Amy’s not here.  Would you like to speak to the dress that swallowed her whole?”

“Honey, I promise you look be—“ Amy snorted.  “Okay, the dress is very ugly, but you are beautiful and once we get you out of that thing, everything will be fine.  Come out, I have champagne and a pretty white dress.”

Amy thought she heard the clerk say, “What she needs is a tranquilizer.”

“Come out.  You’ll marry Ian, and then we’ll kill the tutu together okay?”

Five minutes later, after they had cut her free, she sheepishly apologized to the clerk before walking out with Emily.  “Can we burn it too?”

“Of course.  Now let’s get you married. “


7 Responses to “the dress by parenthesized”

  1. jadamthwaite February 15, 2010 at 2:46 pm #

    Hee hee! I hope she gets there on time! I like the way you made the dress the mistake rather than the wedding.

  2. juleshg February 15, 2010 at 11:47 pm #

    I LOVE IT! cCn you imagine that poor clerk when the hysterical bride showed up. I loved the quip about needing a tranquilizer dart.

  3. ingridfnl February 16, 2010 at 7:03 pm #

    i love love love love this story. i can see every minute of it in my head. fantastic.

  4. phoenix.writing February 21, 2010 at 6:54 pm #

    ROFL That was awesome! It played out beautifully, and I loved the way that Emily could handle Amy properly, acknowledge how ugly the dress was, still get the wedding back on track, and admit that the tutu needed to be killed. ^_^

  5. mpeonies February 21, 2010 at 9:15 pm #

    Haha, I really enjoyed reading this. I like your characterization of Amy, and the way you included her internal thoughts. It really carried the humor all the way through the story.

  6. jmforceton February 25, 2010 at 2:05 pm #

    “”; I agree with juleshg, “Amy thought she heard the clerk say, “What she needs is a tranquilizer.”” One of the best and most original of the week.


  1. calling by parenthesized | the character project - May 2, 2010

    […] previously met Amy in the dress.  Paula appeared in knowing […]

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